The One Adjustment That Worked: The Way I Overcame Post-Work Tension Through an Surprising Discovery in the Loft

I frequently become as tense as a wound-up clock once the workday ends. My shoulders grow tense, my breath turns fast and shallow. Usually, closing my laptop with a thud used to lead to the pop of a cork from a wine bottle, wine poured quickly into a glass, that initial sip marking the end of the workday.

Then, several months back, I discovered an old school recorder belonging to my grown son in the attic. I idly blew into it, instantly reminded of the time it was the bane of my life – his daily rehearsals felt like an attack on my ears, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head hours after he had gone to bed.

Instead of throwing it away, I took it down, together with a beginner’s songbook. Growing up, I was the least musical child ever. I’d had recorder lessons at infant school, but never had the opportunity to learn other instruments.

Googling “how to play the recorder”, I viewed many kid-friendly YouTube clips, and got a fingering guide on paper. Looking up simple recorder songs, and was thrilled when I managed to knock out a passable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Admittedly, it was something your average five-year-old could master before first break, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it felt like a huge achievement.

My son questioned my actions (and please could I stop), but I kept going – I liked the way the recorder made me feel. My inability to remember anything meant I had to concentrate on the sheet of paper in front of me, and carefully mimic the finger placements. My breathing slowed down, my attention sharpened, and after nailing that initial shaky melody, I felt euphoric. I had managed to play music.

Now, several months later, I can “play” other nursery rhymes and a passable Ode to Joy. Sure, my rhythm is off, and I must jot down note names, but to me, it’s not about being skilled or a “musician” – it is simply about the pleasure it brings and how it clears my mind while playing.

I learned that few kids play the recorder today, which probably relieves parents, but it made me a little sad and nostalgic for my own school days, and my son’s childhood.

I make it a habit to play each night after work as my first activity, and during those 20 minutes, I escape into my own realm. And afterwards, I feel refreshed and happy.

My friends find it amusing, yet a therapist friend informed me that I was reducing stress, and boosting mental skills, like memory and sound processing, which is precious at my age. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s a real “ode to joy” indeed.